Frequencies of Self-Care
- serenitystonesvt
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
Self-care is a word tossed about like a leaf in the wind, and we chase it, trying to catch it, trying to fit it into the pockets of our lives.
But it’s not meant to be elusive or scheduled into a calendar like a medical appointment.
Self-care is about building up frequencies of peace and joy within you as you release the stress, pain, and inner struggles...it's about spiraling through the layered experiences of being human with as much ease and grace as we can assemble each day.
Feeling compassion for yourself, loving yourself, is to speak to the beautiful essence within you, to draw it forth and hold it close and deeply care about the entirety of You—mind, body, and spirit. This way of holding loving kindness within you is vital to your well-being.
You cannot be truly, warmly present for others if you aren’t benevolent with yourself, listening to your body’s needs, to your mind’s self-talk, to your soul’s guidance. As Pema Chödrön writes,
"Be kinder to yourself.
And then let your kindness flood the world."
However, for many of us, the concept of self-care seems, well, quite selfish!
So, is self-care selfish?
No, it’s a powerful choice.
It's a choice we make to imbue our lives with the emotional and mental uplift of energy that comes from following our passions and experiencing the beautiful places, the wonderful people, or the joyful events that align with who we are at our core.
“Self-care is a popular term, but it’s often misunderstood. It’s not only about taking bubble baths or drinking green juice. It’s about the energy behind what we do (or don’t do) and how we show up for ourselves. It’s about tending and talking to ourselves in ways that enhance the genuine wellbeing of our mind, body, heart, and spirit.”
Self-care, then, is actually compassion for your Self on the deepest levels of your being.
Self-care means your inner well of energy refills—we all know that "running on empty" leads to degeneration. Without self-care, we actually devolve into selfishness, into emotional immaturity, and/or physical and mental dis-ease/disease because we have unmet needs.
“As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others.”
-Maya Angelou
Ultimately, treating ourselves tenderly is just as important as the care and kindness we offer others.
Through the act of self-care, we heal—and I use this word broadly, encompassing everything from simply releasing the stresses of the day with a hot drink or a long shower, to working through trauma, to reducing inflammation and pain in the physical body.
We heal through engaging with our needs. Through the act of self-care, we offer this frequency of loving kindness, of Wholeness, to those around us, as well.
“But this revolutionary act of treating ourselves tenderly can begin to undo the aversive messages of a lifetime.” - Tara Brach
The concept of self-care is much deeper than the neatly marketed packages of spa days or retreats, “green juice and bubble baths”—it is, in essence, all about the frequencies of peace, compassion, interconnection, and love and how we anchor those vibrations within ourselves; and, respectively, on this earth for others, too.
It is about rewriting how to be individuals yet interconnected.
It's about a sharing of those positive vibes, a continual loop of giving and receiving them.
A spiraling frequency of loving kindness.
We need to charge up—body, mind, and soul—to offer the loving vibrations of care, sympathy, compassion, and understanding to those in our orbits as their orbits cross ours, as we cross theirs.
Carrying "positive vibes" within you supports others. And when you don't have those vibes, someone else does, and you are then uplifted. It's a spiraling frequency of loving kindness.
Returning to the initial question: is self-care selfish? Not at all! Because when individuals take care of the Self, they can help others trying to take care of their Selves: we lift each other up, ideally.
We begin to “undo the aversive messages,” and humanity—again, ideally—functions in a more emotionally intelligent, peaceful, loving way.
If you’d like some support on your self-care journey, please do book a session…I’d be honored to walk with you!
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